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Archive for the ‘What do you want to change?’ Category
Wednesday, August 18th, 2010
What are you saying to yourSelf right now? How many nice things did you tell yourSelf today? How many mean or negative things did you tell yourSelf today? Your experiment for the rest of this week is to count. You may surprise yourSelf.
Is there something in your life that you want to do? Why aren’t you doing it? Money? Time? You don’t think you’re good enough? What is it you are telling yourSelf? Figure it out so you can move past it. The first step is to identify your thought patterns. Then you can focus on changing them.
Here are some examples of negative self-talk:
“I’m not good at…”
“I don’t have time now”
“I need to earn money first”
“I’ve waited too long now”
“Who cares?”
“I don’t know how to…”
These are just a few examples. Ever hear these words in your head?
Here is a quote from Martha Graham: “There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action. And because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open… whether you choose to take an art class, keep a journal, record your dreams, dance your story or live each day from your own creative source. Above all else, keep the channel open!”
This inspires me! I want to jump up and start dancing right now! Maybe I will. But first, I will ask that you identify your negative self-talk. Take out a sheet of paper and put today’s date at the top. Then make 2 columns- 1 for negative self-talk and the other for self given compliments. Do this for a week and you will automatically begin to clue in to what you are doing to yourSelf. The second week, keep track again, but purposely try to give yourSelf more positive reinforcement. See what happens and report back.
Cheers to you!!!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Happiness, Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | 1 Comment »
Thursday, August 12th, 2010
Is guilt a useful emotion? To be honest, I’m not sure. Maybe, if it makes you move your butt to do the things you say you are going to do. But if you just sit there and continue to feel guilty, then I would say, not too useful.
Dump it. You don’t need it. How? Well, first ask yourself what it is exactly that you feel guilty about. Is it something that someone else expects of you, or is it something that you expect of yourself? Which has a higher priority for you?
If it is something that someone else expects of you, it might be something that you feel has no value in your life. So on a list of priorities, where does it fall? Maybe it’s not even on your list. In this case, you just have to decide to take care of yourself and dump the guilt and the pressure of the outside influence. That’s it. Just make the decision. Dump it. You don’t need it. It’s not useful and life is too short.
Now what about if it IS something on your priority list, but maybe it’s not that high up? Doesn’t have to happen immediately, but decide when you can get to it, and go about your life. Dump the guilt.
How about the items that are at the top of your list of priorities that you just don’t do? Ok, well, why aren’t you doing them? Ask yourself why? Afraid it won’t be perfect? Don’t know where to start? It’s too big and overwhelming? Whatever you reason, identify it. You WANT to get this thing done, it’s IMPORTANT to you, and you’re just not doing it, so you feel terrible.
What would make you feel better? Sitting and feeling guilty? Or doing the thing you want to get done? That’s your decision.
This last example comes up a lot in fitness. I have had 3 people recently tell me that my posts on facebook regarding fitness have made them feel guilty, fat and lazy. What does that tell you? It tells me that they think they ’should’ be exercising but they can’t get themselves to do it.
It’s just one example. It could be ANYTHING! If you want to do it, identify your excuses for not doing it. Then just take one step. Baby steps…
Remember that Martin Luther King Jr quote “Just take the first step. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step”, and hop on out there!!
I am going to look into this more deeply, but in the meantime, please share your thoughts and where you are with your ‘guilt’ in the comments.
Life is TOO short for guilt!! If you want something done, just take the first step!
Cheers to you!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Happiness, Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Thursday, July 29th, 2010
Once upon a time, when I was still into acting, I needed headshots. I ended up in the home of photographer and actress, Kris Carr, and we hit it off. Had a great time, best headshots I ever had done, and I was on my way.
Went on with my life, and my lovely day with Kris faded into the background.Â
Then one day, I had a random free hour, and I found myself wandering around the Borders bookstore by Wall Street. I was walking up some stairs and I saw a picture of her on the front of a film called “Crazy Sexy Cancer”. Say what? Before I could really register any full thoughts in my head I picked it up. Sure enough, since our last visit, she had been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. And, sure enough, she had grabbed it by it’s you know whats and made a film about her experience! The film was produced in 2007. Ever heard of it?
You have probably heard me talk about the Everything is Energy radio show as well. I love it! Well, I just heard Kris speak on the show, and I was inspired and moved by what she and the hosts of the show had to say.
The title of this blog post, if you haven’t already guessed, is from her website www.crazysexycancer.com. And it is so soo true. A carpe diem of sorts. So here’s what she had to say:
When she was first diagnosed, she was running around NYC living life, having a grand ole’ time. Not getting enough sleep, partying with friends, pushing pushing pushing, having a power bar and coffee for breakfast, generally not living a completely healthy lifestyle, but not anything we would consider too unhealthy. Right?  Â
She said there were signs that things were off. Just little bitty signs at first. The hosts of the Everything is Energy radio show have this ongoing theme that comes up where you get little hints from the Universe that you’re not on your path. First it feels like a feather, then a sort of bump on the head, and finally accelerates til it hits you like a Mack Truck. So, this cancer, for Kris, was the Mack Truck.
She talks about how she certainly doesn’t know everything, and how some days are better than others. She has crying days, Super Energetic days, and then there are the days when she allows herself to sleep in. When she was hit by the metaphorical Mack Truck, the thing that changed immediately was her view on her life. She decided to live, to learn about healthy foods, healthy lifestyles and she even wrote a book about it. Her tumors have decreased miraculously in size. The main thing here is that she learned to listen to herself. When her body tells her to rest, she rests. When she needs to cry, she allows the release. How many of us just push on through? She has become more in tune with herSelf, and I think that is the key here.
She says repeatedly that she does not have the ‘Answer’ to everything. She just shares her way, and hopes that it can help others. She also has made it clear that her plight is not just about surviving cancer, but about LIVING YOUR LIFE!!! Her question to you, and mine as well, is what will it take for you to give yourSelf permission to LIVE?
She has an idea, which she says on the recording. It is a ‘Cancer for a Day’ program. If you woke up and found out that you had Cancer and had a few months to a few years to live, what would you change? Ok, well then CHANGE IT NOW! Don’t wait for someone to tell you that you are dying! Live the way you want to live. If you don’t know how to do it, just take the first step!
“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step” -Martin Luther King, Jr.
If you would like to hear the recording go to www.everythingisenergy.com. They have free podcasts on itunes.
Back to my question, and Kris’. What would you change about your life if you woke up and found out you had cancer?
Here’s to Your Health!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Happiness, Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | 1 Comment »
Sunday, July 18th, 2010
Everything in your life is a Result. Your weight is a result. Your financial situation is a result. The state of your relationships is a result. You get the picture.
So then I have to ask: Are you happy with your results?
If yes- FANTASTIC! Keep up the good work!
If not- ask yourself what you are thinking and what you are doing/or not doing to bring you your current results.
You cannot fix the situation without getting to the root of the problem.
Let’s look at that literally. Think of your life as a tree. You may think the fruits on the tree are too sour or maybe there are bugs in the fruit. Maybe the fruits aren’t growing as they should. In any case, complaining about the fruit that exists now isn’t going to fix them. Even sending the current fruits ‘positive vibes’ isn’t going to fix them. They are what they are. You’ve got to go to the roots of your tree if you want the fruit to be different.
Your results are an effect of the choices you have made. Unless you alter your choices, the results will stay the same. So what do you want?
First- look at what you are thinking. When you think something that is not useful to you, hit your cancel button and replace the thought with another that is closer to serving your purpose. It doesn’t have to be too far out there. It just needs to be something you can grasp. Just a slightly better thought than the one that it is replacing. You can work slowly up the ladder of your thoughts.
Second- what are you saying out loud? What do you say to your friends? Are you complaining on your facebook wall posts? Whatever you put out there is extremely potent. Why? Because you give meaning to your words and you believe them, whether you’re aware of this or not. Â When people you interact with hear what you say, it strengthens the meaning. For example- how you believe others see you affects to some degree how you see yourself in most cases. So watch what you say. Just make it easier for yourself by leaving out the stuff that isn’t serving your purpose.
Third- what ACTIONS are you taking? Taking a nap is an action. Watching 5 hours of tv is an action. Eating ice cream is an action. Going to the gym is an action. Calling a friend, buying a pair of shoes, staring at the wall, reading a book, putting your legs over your head. All actions. So what are you doing to get you your current results? Decide what actions will lead you towards your goal, and put a plan in place. For example: Every day write down your goal and three action steps, however small, that will lead you towards that goal.
Once that is done, you have set yourself a new path. You will head down that path and eventually get to where you are going.
Cheers to that!!!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Love, Money, Motivation/Inspiration, Relationships, Weight Loss, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Sunday, July 11th, 2010
Heh heh. Here’s an appropriate title for me to write about today. It’s Sunday, such a beautiful Sunday. I LOVE Sundays because it is the only day of the week that I do not need to be anywhere at any certain time- which means I can sleep until I am done sleeping. One day to get enough sleep. One day without an alarm clock. I always look forward to Sundays. It’s my reward for going full force all week. I believe strongly in a work/reward system.
I had a fantastic time last night. Went to a bbq, met some new people, ate well, had some wine, and came home ready for a good night’s sleep. Ahhhh….
I don’t know what time it was, but I know it was before 7. I do not permit myself to communicate much before 8am because for some reason, things always come out wrong. Funny, but true. Anyway, sometime, in the 6am arena, Daisy the Wonder Dog went into a rant. Daisy resides at my Jersey Weekend Getaway, not in the city with me during the week, and is a sweet dog most of the time. I have a tendency to forget that she rants. But she was on a rant in the arena of 6am-ish. On Sunday.
When I say rant, I mean RANT! It’s not like your dog barking. Even if your dog is stark raving mad and bark bark barking like crazy, it’s still nothing compared to Daisy’s rants. She is deaf and she has something to prove. So for seemingly no reason in particular, she went nuts. And kept going nuts. When Daisy starts this stuff, it stops your heart for a moment. It literally hurts my stomach. Fun way to wake up! On Sunday…
So, here I am, trying to figure out what to do with my baggy saggy eyes and all the helpless hopeless thoughts I am having. Think about it- what can I do? Stab the dog? Horrible! I don’t think so. Perhaps send her to obedience school, or get one of those citronella collars, but it’s not my call.
I can’t do one thing about Daisy’s rants. I can, however, do something about my actions. How many of you know the Serenity Prayer? What do I have the power to change? What do I have to let go of? Can I just accept the Sunday morning Rants?
Now, let’s be honest here, this is an easy breezy example of this. One more day of not sleeping enough isn’t going to kill me. But it’s a good place to learn a lesson. What DO I have control of in this situation? I can control whether I am around Daisy on Sunday morning, I can wear ear plugs (though I’m guessing they won’t help, but maybe I’ll try). I can get up early on Sundays with Daisy and take a nap in the middle of the day.
I don’t like any of these choices, but the fact is- there ARE choices! You ALWAYS have a choice! When you feel hopeless and helpless- whether it’s a life or death matter or something as benign as the dog barking out of control- look at your choices. They are there. They may be crap, but if you look at them, you put yourself back in the power seat. Look at your choices. If you choose to do nothing and just whine and complain, then that is your choice.
Hey, it’s valid. Today I chose to whine and complain from 7-10am. Now I’m done with that and going to figure out how to approach next week. Making your choices one day at a time or even moment to moment makes things more manageable.
So what is going on in your life that you feel helpless about? What choices have you made? To complain? (Hint- it’s still complaining even if it’s only in your head!) To accept? Do you mean it? Did you really accept it and let it be? Figure out what your next move is- just in this moment. Make that choice, take that step. Figure out the next step when the time comes. You’ll know.
If you ever feel anxiety or dread- here is a short video from Michelle Bersell that may help you make choices: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-2kBE1UdUE
Empower yourself with the knowledge that you have choices. Good luck!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Monday, June 28th, 2010
Just who do I think I am telling you all the things I tell you? I am the person who has been inundating herself with fitness and personal development for so long that I am now in the perfect position to help you live a happier life. Fitness is my platform.
I figure, we all think certain things- why is that? Because they were told to us, they’re part of our environment, we just think that’s the way things are because that’s the way we’ve always known them to be. How do you know what you don’t know if you don’t know it?
So I thought to myself one day, if I’m going to think things, why not think things that are going to point me in the direction I want to go? What a simple thought!
I started doing just that. It’s quite a journey, folks. It seems to me, that it’s one thing to think “I’m going to think what I want to think!” and to actually do it.
It takes practice! You first have to learn how to step out of yourself and realize your thoughts are not YOU! (Suggested reading- The Power of Now by Eckhardt Tolle).
While you’re working on not identifying so deeply with your thoughts, you begin to recognize the thoughts that aren’t serving you.
Then you can say to yourself “Cancel!Cancel!” and replace the useless thought that does not serve you, with one that does.
I also make a point to read things that I want in my head. So that I’m consciously choosing the information that I want in my mind. I don’t allow anything in that doesn’t work for me. I consciously choose where I want to go.
I struggle with my thoughts sometimes, just like everyone does. The trick is to not get carried away with the thoughts. When I feel sorry for myself, or mean to myself, or whatever I am feeling and thinking that is so obviously sending me in the wrong direction, I make a conscious effort to say “Cancel that thought!” and then replace it with the one I have on standby for just such an occasion.
Give it a try.
Let me know how it goes!!
Your Wellness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Sunday, June 13th, 2010
What do you think about when you are in a fitness class? Do you think about what you’re going to eat for dinner? Do you think of all the crap you put up with at work that day? Do you ponder your current relationship issues? What in the world are you thinking about?
What if, and I’m just throwing this out there, you thought about what you were doing? Seriously. Do you think you would get more out of it? Yes. You would.
I’m coming from the assumption that you’re there to get stronger and improve yourself in some way, mentally and or physically.
If you are in class to decompress from your daily grind, then you may show up to mentally vent. Get through the venting quickly, and then move on as venting may help you decompress, but it will keep you stuck where you are. Keep in mind that whatever you focus on shows up in your life more. So if you’re in class thinking about how you hate your job, then your job is going to give you more reasons to hate it. It’s just the way it works, folks.
If you’re in class and you’re doing lunges and you’re thinking “my legs are getting stronger- right now!” then guess what!! They ARE going to get stronger, faster than if you hadn’t been focusing on it.
Being in a fitness class is a great time to practice being present and focus on what you are doing. When you can become fully present in any moment, you are then more in control to what goes on in your life and how affected you are by the minutiae. By practicing being fully present, we begin to move away from the mechanical way we habitually go through life, and start to live life on purpose.Â
If you can practice being present in a class, you will become stronger faster, and you will begin to enjoy your life more. Your perspective overall will widen and you will see things you had blinders to previously.
How do you do this? Simply by paying attention to what you are doing in every moment. Practice in your fitness class. Think about what you want out of that lunge, or the push-up, or the rear delt flies. Then check in with yourself to see how you feel after class.
Do it on purpose.
Enjoy!!
Your Wellness Coach/Personal Trainer/Group Fitness Instructor/Pilates and Yoga Instructor/Adventure Guide,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Fitness Tips, Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Monday, June 7th, 2010
I unplugged from the Matrix for a few days last week to head to the White Mountains of New Hampshire. On Thursday of last week,  Ron and I hiked up to the top of Mount Washington. It is 6,288 feet.
Ok, so, I lead outdoor fitness adventures- FitVentures- and I run and jump all over the place and keep on going in the most crazy situations. So how can I say this? This hike kicked my butt. We began at 8:30am and finished at 8pm. That’s 11.5 hours of walking, climbing, crawling in about 5 different climates with a few breaks here and there. 11.5 hrs to travel 8 miles.
We started off in a happy way, a little bit of rain, but not too bad. We hiked, and hiked, and hiked and noticed we weren’t above the treeline yet, so we hiked some more. And then, after what seemed like forever,we were above the tree line and it leveled out for a bit and there was sunshine! So we caught our breath and had some snacks. After that we were faced with an almost vertical rock face. It looked unclimbable. But we climbed it. Kept a steady pace, but it went on and on and was very challenging. By then we had been hiking about 5 hours. The terrain began to look like a different planet, kind of like the bottom of the ocean. The weather turned ’soupy’. Mist and fog to the point where we couldn’t see more than 20 feet, maybe 30. We got through that little section. Then straight up the rocks again. This time it started to pour down rain. Sideways. Very windy. We were working our bodies so hard that we didn’t feel cold. But we couldn’t see, and we couldn’t really hear through our hoods. I was on all fours, literally climbing and scrambling over the wet rocks. I saw one cairn, nothing else, made it there and looked for the next. Luckily they are only spread 30 feet apart for just such a day. It was so preposterous that I found I was laughing a lot. Ron asked if I was ok, because I think I was singing.
I was working my body very hard. It was over 6 hours by then. I didn’t feel pain and I didn’t feel overheated. Just moving from one step to the next, never knowing how much farther we had to go because we couldn’t see. I have to say I very much enjoyed the experience. I felt rough and tough and knew I was pushing past my edge- to that point where you get stronger. And not just my body in this case. I was definitely working my mind. Teaching myself, literally, that if I keep taking the steps towards my goal- there is no choice but to arrive at it. And we did! It was so foggy and rainy and windy that we couldn’t see where we were going and wandered around a parking lot for 10 minutes before we figured out how to get to the summit building. We took a 20 minute break there- refilled our waters, changed socks, ate a snack, and then we were off again!
Going down was fun, too. We took a different route. The rocks were slippery from the rain, and we still couldn’t see, so we were a little slower than we would have been otherwise. At about 7pm my mind just shut down. I am not sure how I kept putting one foot in front of the other. I just kept moving, but my good mood and bright spirits were just gone. Like a switch had been thrown. No crying, no whining, just nothing. Zombified. When we finally got back to our lodge I was a little concerned I would never want to hike again. I was honestly a little put off. Like someone made that mountain so darn big just to piss me off.
After a hot shower, a meal and some sleep I was feeling better and just looking back at the whole experience in awe. I pushed past my edge, found more, then pushed past my edge that I didn’t even know was there, found MORE, and pushed past that next edge that I hadn’t imagined existed, and somehow found EVEN MORE! I don’t know where I pulled that last hour from. I want to try it again!
I think our minds are much more powerful than we give them credit for. I was aware of my mind’s determination to just keep putting one foot in front of the other about 2 hours into the hike. And I kept up that determination for 10.5 hours. After that, most of my mind shut down, but my body kept going because some little part of me tells me there’s no other option. We wanted to be out of there by dark, so moving forward is the only option. So we did.
So, I ask you, how can you challenge yourSelf physically AND mentally? What are you afraid of? What challenge can you give yourSelf? Write it here so it’s ‘out’ there…
Go For It!!
Your Fitness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
Tuesday, May 25th, 2010
In the last post, we talked about what it is that you want. The first step to achieving your goals is to decide what they are! Sounds simple, but we can be kind of vague when we send our wishes out into the universe. So, did you decide what you want?
It may be something you’ve been playing with for a while, or it may be a brand new idea. Either way, you’ve got it in your mind now. The first thing you want to do is support that thought. How do you do that? Come up with an affirmation. You can call it what you want- an affirmation, a declaration, or maybe just a positive statement. Whatever, it serves the purpose of supporting your idea.
And why do you need support? Because, sooner or later, some Fears and Doubts are going to creep into your mind. If you’ve got no defense, you’re doomed! So, for example, say your goal is to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks. When you begin on this journey you will be totally psyched, sure of yourself, and ready!! Then, maybe in 2 weeks, maybe less, the Fears and Doubts will creep in. You’ll fall off the wagon and think you can’t do it, for whatever reason.Â
In preparation for your journey, you’ve got to come up with your supporting thought. First, imagine what you will feel like when you’ve achieved your goal. Write that down and put it somewhere that you can see it. Then decide what reward you are going to give yourself for achieving the goal. Write that down and put it in the same place. Next, write out your affirmation. Create it in the present tense, stating what you want as if you already have it, and how you feel about that. Repeat the affirmation to yourself every morning and every night, and keep the written version out where you can see it.
This way, when f&d’s pop up- you can say CANCEL!! And replace those negative thoughts with your positive declaration.
Report back on how you’re doing!
Remember, I WANT to help you achieve your goals, so post them here, and allow yourself to be supported.
Your Fitness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | 2 Comments »
Sunday, May 9th, 2010
This is the reason that I talk about Life and overall wellness instead of just giving you fitness tips. I love fitness tips, but you can bicycle crunch until your eyeballs pop out and still have the possibility of being miserable if your mind isn’t in the right place. Exercise can lead to happiness- that is the end goal- but only if you exercise your mind while you exercise your body.
I had one client who told me she wanted thinner thighs. So we worked for a year, and she had thinner thighs. She looked great! And then she told me she wanted them to be thinner. I think I yelled a little when I said “So what then, you want to just be a torso?!” I gave her the speech that we can keep changing the outside alllll she wants, but there is something on the inside that keeps her from liking herself and her life.
What you think will create your reality. You may say you can’t control what you think, but you actually can! You can choose to think thoughts that are good for you. Dismiss the thoughts that aren’t working for you. Yes, they will pop into your head. And then what? Cancel cancel!! Replace it with a thought that is healthy for you and serves your best self. With practice you will get better at this. Your awareness will grow and you will recognize that you have power over your life.
So when you think your thighs are ugly, cancel that thought!! Send your thighs happy thoughts! Love your thighs- they get you from place to place! Trust me, you do not want to be a torso. Treat your body as if it is already fantastic. It actually is. You will open the way to becoming stronger and healthier.
That said, YES, continue to make your body stronger. Since I used thighs as an example-work out those thighs and appreciate them along the way.
Here’s one of my favorite exercises for fantastic strong thighs!
Stand with feet together. Jump with legs turned out from hips into a wide 2nd position plie squat- hold 3 counts, jump back to beginning position for 1 count. Repeat 15x- work your way up to 30x and finish with a 10 count hold. You can do this every other day.
Keep on Keeping on!
Your Fitness Coach,
Miranda Zukowski
Posted in Fitness Tips, Motivation/Inspiration, What do you want to change? | No Comments »
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